Mom on-the-run

One day I met a lady, a lovely lady, very charming, had three wonderful children. I soon learned this lady was in a destructive situation with the father of her youngest child. She told me all the gory details which I could relate to and believed she was in a situation with a sociopath.

I instantly offered my support because I believed I could help her get out of the situation and rid herself of her sons destructive father. I encouraged her to go to the police and fight for full custody of her son. She did both!

She got an injunction against him and took him to court and he lost his parental rights and in tern lost all access to his son. I ended up for the next 4 years being a father figure to her 3 children. She apparently was always at work or at business meetings.

I began to feel like a single father of 3 children when in reality I was just a friend of their mum. I picked them up from school, made their dinner, did their homework with them, got them tucked up in bed and then she would roll home. This was 5 days a week and then at weekend 2 of the children went to stay with their father and the 3rd came to stay at mine.

She very rarely saw her children and certainly never spent any quality time with them. This lady said she had her own business within social services, employed numerous people and was some property big wig, I had no reason to doubt her!

Super-psychopath-momAfter time the cracks started to appear, things didnt ring true and it became evident that she was lying to me. Basically she prayed on me when I was very vulnerable and undergoing therapy for post traumatic stress disorder after what I’d been through with my health in the hands of a sociopath. She manipulated me on a totally different level and she functioned very different to my ex partner. The last straw was when I got a phone call off a man she claimed not to be sleeping with but was, he asked me if I was well.

Obviously I questioned why would he be interested in my health. He said my so called friend had told him that I was dying from cancer and had used that to manipulate £5000 out of him. She said she wanted to make the time I had left the best time of my life.

I wasnt surprised to hear this because it became evident to me on other occassions that she lied about her own health and others many times to me before. She even told her own elderly parents that she had cancer. There was a point in my so called friendship with her when I told her about my health and she then went on to say she also had HIV, I never believed her!

I wanted to walk away about 2 years ago but felt responsible for the children, however her 2 daughters have now left home and gone to live with their father because of her lies and destructive behaviour, and fortunately for her son shes now manipulated a very kind lady in to living with her so i know for now the child still there with her will be ok.

My only concern is that she’s lied in a family court and lost an innocent man his parental rights and a wonderful little boy his father.

I feel guilty because I supported her in this because I too believed her lies. I feel its only right to expose her to the court, but dont want to make myself vulnerable. For once in my life I had to put myself first. I just hope she doesnt cause me any trouble now I’ve walked away and cut all ties.

Would really appreciate peoples thoughts.

This story was submitted by a psychopath victim. – Admin

Blood Drawn, STDs – Why Me?

Why me!!! It appears that i’m a magnet to sociopaths to the degree I have lost all trust in people and spend the majority of my time alone.

I have really suffered at the hands of these evil creatures. Not only mental abuse but my health is also in tatters. In 2005 I met a charming man who worked within the care industry, he was in the choir and appeared to be held in high regard within society.

I’m not afraid to take responsibility for making bad choices but it became evident that i was manipulated in to making those choices. A sexual relationship with this man soon developed and based on his believable reasons no protection was used.

Four months into the relationship I fell really ill and ended up in hospital. Many tests were run and it was discovered that I had throat cancer. I was devastated but got no support whatsoever from my partner, not even a visit in hospital. Whilst having to come to terms with being diagnosed with cancer my doctor informed me that the tests also showed serious inflammation of my liver.

Beware-psychopath-gifts-hiv-syphilis-hepatitis-b-std-psychopath-victimsThey questioned how much alcohol I drank but I dont drink so that was out the question. Up on reflection I asked the doctor to give me a full sexual health screen to rule hepatitis out. When the results came back I went in to shock, I was HIV positive, had Hepatitis B and to top it all I had syphilis. I truly believed my life was over. It all started to make sense why my partner wouldnt visit me in hospital.

After a couple of weeks in hospital I was eventually allowed home to continue treatment as an outpatient. My partner was there to greet me, he said not to worry he still wanted me even if no one else would, under the circumstances I felt grateful. Both my parents have sadly passed and I have one sister of whom ive never had a close relationship with, and I didnt feel able to reach out for support from my friends due to the stigma attached to HIV so kept them at arms length and intern felt very isolated.

Over the next few months things went from bad to worse, I wasnt working because of my health and intern I had a lot of time to reflect.

To cut a long story short it became evident the man who claimed to love me had intentionally infected me with his infections and when I threatened to go to the police he attacked me with a knife, fortunately I only suffered minor injuries. I ran out the house and telephoned the police. When the police arrived I was outside in total fear of my life. They went in the house only to find him covered in blood! He’d cut himself with the knife a said I’d attacked him.

They arrested us both and I spent the night in prison. I was released in the morning pending further inquiries, he was released later on that day and manipulated his way straight back in to my home. I was desperate for the police to help me but was left feeling like a bunny boiler, I felt more isolated than ever!!

Why couldnt they see through his charm?!

I was under the power of a sociopath, had no support, my health was in the gutter and I was at a point were I could quite easily have given up. By this time i’d done my homework and ended up learning all about his destructive behaviour and what he was, a sociopath!

I’m not a doctor so couldnt go to the police and say my partner is a sociopath, help me I’m trapped. So i had to learn to play the game and get him out of my life.

After being told on a daily basis I was suicidal and that if I went to the police he would get to me before they got to him and I would be found in a pool of blood he left me. I thought that I’d won the battle to get my life back but then the death threats started. Emails saying ‘hit and run soon’ etc. I was more vulnerable than ever but at least by this time the police started to listen.

The police went to arrest him but couldnt trace him, he’d gone on the run! He left his home, car, job and family and hasnt been seen since. The police insisted I move house for my own safety, which I did. They installed panic buttons in my home and various other gadgets for my protection. Fortunately the death threats have since subsided but that doesnt mean that one day he wont raise his vile head again. This sociopath cost me My health, my life savings, my home and friends = my life. I can only hope and pray he doesnt come back and find me.

A year later in 2008 my health was under control, the cancer treatment had gone amazingly well, the syphilis treatment was 100% successful and I’d gone on meds and my HIV had become undetectable, however I still had Hepatitis B and the doctors said it was now unlikely I would clear it. I was just grateful to have my life back.

This story was submitted by a psychopath victim. – Admin

How to Deal with a Psychopath Video

Hello, my name is David Masters and I’m the author of the Psychopath Victims Toolkit.

A little about me, I’ve been counseling and consulting since the late seventies/early eighties. Occasionally, in the course of my coaching, I would encounter a client that had to mitigate the damages in their life due to the influence of a third-party individual, a “bad person.”

how-to-deal-with-a-psychopath-videoFrom my perspective, there were no such thing as bad people, just lost souls wandering aimlessly through life with little regard for others; and so, the advice that I gave to individuals in those days was very different than I might suggest now.

What I learned, was that there are people who are devoid of particular mental, emotional and spiritual components that compromises their humanity when integrating with other persons, we call these people psychopaths, sociopaths and the recent, more political correctly referred to as being on the Antisocial Personality Disorder spectrum.

That said, there are thousands of variables and no two psychopaths are identical, but they do share many similar characteristics.

So, how can you tell if you’re dealing with a psychopath? Here are some common signs that would indicate that you might be dealing with a psychopath in your life:

Is-he-or-she-a-psychopath-6-item-checklist1. CHARISMATIC

Psychopaths are charismatic and are able to attract supporters easily.

They are wonderful speakers who are able to engage their audience and can easily engage the emotions and attention of those fortunate enough to be in their presence.

They exaggerate stories skewing the truth for their self-serving benefit, and will go as far as to lie and place themselves in someone else’s story and claiming it is their own.

2. SMART

Psychopaths are intellectual. They have a gift of having incredibly sharp wit and intelligence enabling them to masquerade as highly-educated as they bob and weave socially in live situations.

This also makes them excellent con artists able to conceive, plan and execute elaborate schemes, while staying one step ahead of the authorities.

3. NO FEELINGS

Psychopaths have no feelings. They do not grieve, are incapable of feeling guilt, shame or remorse, empowering them to easily victimize anyone. They will enthusiastically engage in anything that bolsters their position at someone else’s expense.

They do not love. They are incapable of giving or receiving love, but terribly acute at acting as though they are madly in-love, if it will help them achieve a desired result.

They are great actors/performers giving them the ability to create any perception of themselves that will achieve for them their desired result.

Even though they can appear to have emotions and use them as tools to manipulate their victims, let there be no doubt, they have no real feelings whatsoever.

4. IMPULSIVE

Psychopaths are impulsive, often acting or speaking without thinking through potential consequences of their words or actions, and are more likely to spontaneously take risks.

They are free of repercussion, since they see themselves as above the law or the constraints of the social norm. No social filters, consequences or guilt.

5. WINNERS

Psychopaths never lose. They will dominate anyone who gets in their way, will viciously defend their position, often by telling lies and spinning wild tales in an effort to discredit anyone with the inclination to disagree with them.

If you are naïve enough to challenge them, be aware that they will wield their powers of persuasion to make you look like a fool for questioning them. Which presumes that they believe themselves to be:

6. NEVER WRONG

Psychopaths are always right. They never apologize; do not feel remorse for hurting others and are incapable of feeling guilt.

If asked to apologize, a psychopath will often strike out and attack their victim, rather than admit they may have made a mistake or misstep.

Now ask yourself, is the person you’re dealing with a psychopath?

Are they charismatic, smart, have no feelings, impulsive, always the winner and never wrong?

Chances are, you’re face-to-face with a psychopath.

You’re probably saying to yourself, “I knew it. I knew there was something wrong with that person…” You are realizing that you should rely more on your intuition that may have been warning you when you first met this person that something was not quite right. If only we learn to listen more to our gut, we would live happier, safe and secure lives, free from those who seek to exploit us.

If nothing else, that is the lesson to be learned from encountering a psychopath, is to trust your instincts and to not let yourself be taken advantage of by a cunning predator.

I would not, now, be an expert in the field of psychopathy had I not had my own first-hand experience with an evil psychopath that opened my eyes to the realities of the disorder. And now I have deep regret for all the folks that I was ill-equipped to be compassionate enough to reach out to them appropriately.

In this way, I may have attracted this psychopathic presence in my own life to benefit those whom it is my calling to assist along their life’s journey.

So, we’ve established that you have found yourself to be the unfortunate victim – or mark – of a psychopath, sociopath or someone amidst the antisocial personality disorder spectrum…

What Can You Do About It?

How to Deal With a Psychopath

How-to-deal-with-a-psychopath-6-item-checklist1. NO CONTACT

The very first thing to do is to crate as much separation as you can as soon as possible between yourself and the psychopath.

You need to distance yourself physically, financially, emotionally, spiritually and in any other way possible from the psychopath and cease any and all communication with him or her, period.

Any further communication or contact after correctly identifying a psychopath will only lead to more risk, or potential loss to you and yours.

Be aware that as you distance yourself, the psychopath will try to cling to you or play on your emotions in order to further victimize you. Do not fall for their manipulation or pity ploys from this point forward. They will try to appeal to your feeling but keep in mind they have no feelings and no regard for yours, except as a method to further victimize you.

You must cut them off. No contact, means no contact. Though this may not be possible, if you work or live with the psychopath; but that will be an issue to be handled specifically and independently of the scope of this primary message.

2. GET HELP

Next, you will need a strong support system. You should seek out a professional, a counselor or therapist, with experience in dealing with psychopaths. Note that early in my practice, even though individuals sought me out for assistance, I was ill-equipped to offer them the support that they needed at the time.

How can someone understand what you are going through, if they do not understand what you are going through… because – and I am as guilty of this as anyone – “things can’t really be all that bad.” But they are, and they can be very bad, and they can get worse if you do not take the appropriate actions.

Seek out a specialist, or at least someone with experience dealing with victims of psychopaths.

3. BE QUIET

Do not talk to your friends about the psychopath. You might think this is a good time to reach out to those in your circle of friends that you can depend on for support, but chances are (if the psychopath has done his or her homework) they have already gotten to them in advance.

If your friends have not been compromised by the psychopath, there is a good chance that they will be, and be forewarned very few people can compete with the ability to manipulate the minds of the unsuspecting, like the psychopath.

Keep things quiet. Do not confront your psychopath, engage in a battle of wits, challenge or attempt an intervention with your psychopath. This will only open you up for further potential pain, suffering and potential loss.

They psychopath has the uncanny ability to turn anything that you say against you. Don’t give them the opportunity.

4. STAY STRONG

Stay the course. If the psychopath has counter-attacks you, don’t respond.

If you communicate anything to this person it should only be silence. Be steadfast and unshakeable, solid as a rock.

He or she must realize that you cannot be manipulated or be bullied into making any kind of response, no matter what they do or say.

Keep a good posture, positive outlook, smile and be confident (even if you don’t feel like it) at all times.

Any indication of weakness will be seen as an opportunity either to insert themselves or launch another attack.

5. DOCUMENTATION

how-to-deal-with-a-psychopath-sociopath-david-m-mastersDocument everything. Keep hard copies of everything you can to document any interaction or statements made by your psychopath and keep it at a secure location.

Watch what you say. Act as if every word you speak is being recorded, and may be read to a jury in the future word-for-word and spun out of context in an effort to make you look like a lunatic.

Maybe someday the people who once trusted you will see the truth, but even so, if your psychopath was a masterful one, they will still wonder about you, even after the true colors of the psychopath are made known.

So, don’t hold onto the false hope of one day being vilified of all the illicit accusations that were made against you. In most cases the effects are permanent, though may fade over time. Maybe, in the afterlife…

6. FORGIVE YOURSELF

Most of all, forgive yourself. You were not the perpetrator, here, you were the victim. And as a victim you may have found yourself in vulnerable or compromising situations, and you may feel like the fool. But you were not the fool. Anyone could be victimized by the proficient psychopath and it happens every day in all walks of life and levels of society.

You could not have seen this coming… but now that you are aware, you are less likely to become a victim again… and maybe you can help others to see the signs – or at least be aware – that there are evil people out there, the virtual wolves in sheep’s clothing, who seek to destroy the lives of others without remorse.

Thank you for joining me for this message. It is my hope that this information will help to save you and other from further potential pain, suffering or loss at the hands of the psychopath. Pass this information on to others who may be potential victims.

For more information, or to contact me, visit psychopath victims dot com.

Forever Bea: I married a psychopath in search of my soul mate

One woman’s courage to share her story is revealed in Shirli Kieffer’s Forever Bea delineating the details of Bea Davison’s search for her soul mate. Her story that begins as a god-fearing, hippie commune flower-child and follows her life, loves and struggles that come with psychopaths are drawn to you like a moth to the flame.

Forever-Bea-I-married-a-psychopath-in-search-of-my-soulmate

Davison’s attempt to live as a normal member of society after leaving the commune is fraught with unforeseen challenges.

Walking a mile in Bea’s shoes won’t change your life, but if you’ve been involved in a romantic relationship with a sociopath, you will find it comforting that you are neither alone, nor crazy.

And, hopefully, like Ms. Davison, you will never give up, remain optimistic and believe in love, while being cautious about the people that you allow to have access to your most intimate hopes, wants, dreams and desires.

You are not alone.

Forever Bea: I married a psychopath in search of my soul mate

is available in paperback and Kindle formats.

 

What is a Psychopath?

Predatory psychopaths cannоt be understood in terms оf antisocial rearing оr development. They аre effortlessly morally depraved people whо represent thе “monsters” in our society. They arе unstoppable anԁ untreatable predators whose violence іѕ planned, purposeful аnd emotionless. The violence continues until it reaches a plateau аt age 50 or ѕo, then tapers off.

 

There arе four (4) basic subtypes of psychopaths. The oldest distinction was produced bу Cleckley back in 1941 bеtween primary anԁ secondary.

Their emotionlessness reflects а detached, fearless, anԁ maybe dissociated state, revealing а low-state autonomic nervous system аnԁ lack of anxiety. It’s difficult to say what motivates them – manage аnd dominance possibly – given that thеir life history will continually show nо lengthy-standing bonds wіth others nor significantly rhyme to theіr reason (оthеr than plotting for violence or abuse).

They tend tо operate wіth а grandiose demeanor, a sense оf entitlement, an insatiable appetite, аnd а tendency toward sadism. Fearlessness iѕ probably thе prototypical (core) characteristic (thе low-fear hypothesis). It’s helpful tо think of them as high-speed cars wіth ineffective brakes.

Certain organic (brain) disorders аnԁ hormonal imbalances mimic thе state оf mind of а psychopath.

PRIMARY PSYCHOPATHS do not respond tо punishment, apprehension, stress, оr disapproval. They appear tо bе able to inhibit theіr antisocial impulses mоѕt of the time, nоt bеcauѕe оf conscience, but because it suits their purpose аt thе time. Words do not appear to hаve thе ѕаmе meaning for thеm aѕ thеу ԁo fоr us. In reality, it’s unclear if thеy even grasp the meaning оf thеіr own words, a condition thаt Cleckley referred to as “semantic aphasia.” They don’t follow basic societal rules, аnԁ it appears аs if thеy аre incapable of experiencing anу genuine emotion.

SECONDARY PSYCHOPATHS аrе the risk-takers, that are morе likely tо be tension-reactive, worriers, anԁ guilt-prone. They expose themѕelvеѕ to morе tension thаn thе typical person, on the other hand, thеy arе аs vulnerable to tension as the average individual. (This suggests that they аrе not “completely psychopathic.” This could possibly bе due to different genetic variations.)

They аrе daring, adventurous, unconventional individuals who started playing by their оwn rules early іn life. They arе strongly driven by а desire tо escape or keep away from discomfort, yet аrе unable to resist temptation. As thеir stress increases toward sоme forbidden object, ѕо dоes thеir attraction to it. They live their lives bу thе lure оf temptation. Both primary anԁ secondary psychopaths can bе subdivided іnto:

DISTEMPERED PSYCHOPATHS are the kind that seems tо fly іntо а rage or frenzy extra quickly аnԁ morе generally than оthеr subtypes. Their frenzy will resemble аn epileptic fit. They аre also usually men wіth incredibly robust sex drives, capable оf astonishing feats оf sexual energy, and seemingly obsessed bу sexual urges ԁuring a major component оf their waking lives. Powerful cravings as well appear tо characterize them, aѕ іn drug addiction, kleptomania, pedophilia, аny illicit оr illegal indulgence. They which include the endorphin “high” or “rush” off of excitement аnd risk-taking. The serial-rapist-murderer known аs the Boston Strangler wаѕ such a psychopath.

CHARISMATIC PSYCHOPATHS are charming, appealing liars. They arе consistently gifted at sоmе talent оr an additional, and thеy use it to theіr advantage іn manipulating other people. They аre normally quick-talkers, anԁ possess a nearly demonic capacity to persuade others out оf everything thеу оwn, even their lives. Leaders of religious sects оr cults, for example, might possibly bе psychopaths if thеу lead their followers to thеіr deaths. This subtype generally comes tо believe іn their own fictions. They are irresistible.

Sociopaths have always existed іn varying form anԁ to a variety of degrees. They hаve been identified by various titles. They havе beеn studied using a variety of methods, and thrоugh the years theіr ailment hаѕ been blamed оn a lot of causes. But 1 thing never ever varies: all sociopaths share three frequent attributes. They are аll vеrу egocentric people wіth no empathy for others, anԁ they аrе incapable of feeling remorse оr guilt. [The Sociopath Rebecca Horton (April 1999)]

Psychopaths are consistently superficially charming and normally make a striking impression as possessing of thе noblest of human qualities. They make friends rapidly, аnd are extremely manipulative, utilizing their capacity wіth words tо talk their way out оf any given otherwise sticky situation. Many psychopaths enjoy to bе admired аnԁ bask in the adulation of other people.

While thе psychopath has likes anԁ dislikes аnԁ fondness fоr thе pleasures thаt human business enterprise can bring, analysis shows thаt hе іѕ completely egocentric, valuing other people оnlу for thеir enhancement of hіѕ own pleasure оr status. While he gives no authentic enthusiasm, hе іѕ very capable оf inspiring enthusiasm оf quite often fanatical proportions іn others.

Possessing little or no love, there iѕ also а lack оf empathy. The psychopath іs unable to feel sorry fоr others іn unfortunate cases оr imagine what it must be like to walk in another person’s shoes, whether or not or not thеy hаve bеen harmed bу him or her.