Why Me?

The first question you ask when you’ve been victimized by a psychopath is, “Why me?”

Every victim wants to know why they got singled out, and targeted to be the victim in this scenario?

In my practice, when someone comes in who has been a victim, I’m as grateful as possible as this person has been honored with the position of being a psychopath victim. That sounds crazy, but anyone else besides this person could not have survived the attack by that psychopath. This is a very special person. This is somebody who has the wherewithal to make it, because anyone else? They would have taken their own life by now. It’s that serious.

When you’re in the muck and you’re covered in blood, you can’t see it. But you really are blessed by this, and there are so many other people out there who really need to get this information from you, because no matter how much school a person goes to, you cannot make that connection with a patient unless you’ve worn those shoes, and you know what it feels like.

When you tell your story of what happened to you, people are not going to be able to understand what you’re saying, if they don’t know what you’ve been through. It doesn’t make any sense. Nobody’s going to believe it’s true.

Psychopath Identification

First off, it’s a good idea to know if you’re really dealing with a psychopath. Who are they?

There are probably over a hundred attributes of psychopaths and I’ve narrowed it down to these six. If you find these six characteristics in one person, there’s a pretty good chance you’re dealing with a psychopath. And if it’s not a psychopath, it’s still a bad guy. Right? So, we’d take the same steps. No matter what type of toxic individual that might be.

  1. Charismatic

  2. Smart

  3. No Feelings

  4. Impulsive

  5. Winners

  6. Never Wrong

Not all psychopaths are bad. In fact, our government regularly recruits psychopaths to conduct activities and take on jobs that a normal person just could not do, yet these guys have unparalleled expertise in certain areas, where any pf the rest of us would be utterly useless.

It’s crazy, but apparently, we need these guys in our society, our government relies on them heavily.

So, there are places where they could use their powers for good, instead of evil.

Their impulsivity usually leads them down many roads of addiction. The psychopath seeks to get he maximum feeling out of every moment and the ways they get excited are varied, and chemical solutions to heightening awareness, sensitivity, and feelings of exhilaration abound.

There are also natural methods which give a psychopath an exhilarated feeling, such as simply stepping on an ant. They get a little thrill from that, but imagine how they would feel if they could do that to a real live person? Whoa! What a thrill they get, and they do it whenever they can.

Because psychopaths are winners, it’s impossible to negotiate with them. A successful negotiation will result in everyone getting what they want, or at least some concession(s). With these guy’ there’s no give and take, it’s only “winner takes all” and they are going to win no matter what.

If you try to negotiate or bargain with them, they will reach into their bag of dirty tricks and start turning everything you’ve said or done in the past, twist it up enough to be unrecognizable, weaponize it, and deploy it against you if any negotiation gets too resistant to the achievement of their goal(s).

Sometimes, we get one. We put them behind bars for a while. For predatory psychopaths of the criminal persuasion, this is little more than a parking ticket.

I was able to help put Richard behind bars, and to him it was a “no thing.” In fact, he said, “I can do five years on my head in a toilet.” Which is true. He continued to manipulate others and commit crimes outside of prison from within its walls, and worked his own brand of manipulation inside the walls, vacillating between acting as a “legal beagle.”

While there is “honor among thieves,” there is no honor among psychopaths. Inside he also operated as a “snitch,” rolling over on his contemporaries to build his “relationship” with staff. Everyone is a potential victim. He did so, in essence, to convince the warden that he was “one of them.” This earned him regular trips from population to solitary confinement during his stay for purposes of “protection.”

To psychopaths, detentions is like taking a coffee break, as the stigma which applies to you and me, does not apply to them. They do not have that intimidation, and they do not see incarceration as a “bad thing.” It is just an extension of their working environment.

Plus, imprisonment a great investment vehicle for the criminally minded, as they may only pay the price for one crime out of every fifty, they commit. While they are inside, they have full access to the State Law Library, and get to learn all the latest criminal technologies from other criminals while they are in there. It’s like an all-expenses-paid extended stay at a crime training boot camp.

There is no effective punishment for a predatory psychopath. You can (for the most part) separate them from society momentarily and impede their ability to victimize a greater number of individuals, but you cannot punish them or make them feel bad about their misdeeds.

They may, on the other hand, act remorseful and make persuasive appeals to counselors and parole boards, explaining how sorry they are, how they’ve had a change of heart, or found God. They will act very convincingly, even producing tears, willing to say anything if they think it will help sell their case, so they can return to the playground filled with unlimited opportunities for further victimization.

Never Wrong

Just try to correct one of these guys and see what happens. To them, it will always be someone else’s fault and if anyone was victimized, it was the psychopath, of course.

If you even try to assert that you were right about anything, and they were wrong, be forewarned that you will be subjecting yourself to a lengthy, detailed, exhaustive monologue about how incredibly wrong you are.

Let’s say you catch a psychopath in the act, and you try to explain the concept of theft to them. They cannot comprehend your point of view because they see the taking of someone else’s resources as a normal mode of operation. Thieves often explain that the act of thievery is a job. So, if they’ve stolen something, they have received the stolen items in exchange for conducting their work. Stealing is their job and the stolen items, or the money received from them, is their compensation.

“If they gave it to me, freely, and wanted it back? That would be one thing. I’d give it back.” But if they had to work for it, break-in, or otherwise swindle or con someone out of it, it’s rightfully theirs. They worked for it. That’s how they see it.

They don’t get it.

Different Kinds of Psychopaths

Just as there are all kinds of individuals, no two predatory psychopaths are the same, and some of them have specializations. They subscribe to a certain type of victimization which they have found works very well for them. While their crimes against others may vary, they will often share similar characteristics. Some examples are:

  • abusive psychopath
  • animal abuse psychopath
  • child abuse psychopath
  • con artist psychopath
  • controlling psychopath
  • criminal psychopath
  • educational psychopath
  • elder psychopath
  • embezzler psychopath
  • exploitative psychopath
  • financial psychopath
  • illicit substance psychopath
  • imposter psychopath
  • intimidation psychopath
  • leadership psychopath
  • lover psychopath
  • manipulative psychopath
  • masquerading psychopath
  • military psychopath
  • pathological liar psychopath
  • political psychopath
  • religious psychopath
  • romantic psychopath
  • serial killer psychopath
  • sexual psychopath
  • storyteller psychopath
  • thief psychopath
  • verbally abusive psychopa9th
  • violent psychopath
  • vulnerability psychopath

Interestingly in the State of Washington, where I reside, thanks to Richard and other predatory victimizers, there is a new State extension of law enforcement which focuses on the protection of vulnerable adults.

Predatory psychopaths are always on the lookout for fresh meat, so to speak, and elder adults who are not as sharp as they once were make excellent and easy prey. And, if they’re anything like Richard W Bennett, they will clean you out of everything you have, if given the chance.

Internet Weapons for Psychopaths

There is growing concern around the world about how predatory psychopaths use technology to run con games, manipulate and control people, and exert their revenge on their squirming victims. It is an issue that is very present in the minds of law enforcement and even at this advanced stage is still hard to get a handle on.

And it’s not just the psychopaths using these new technologies, it’s all kinds of predators, criminals, mentally unstable, and even pedophiles are using emerging technologies and social media to recruit, groom, and exploit their victims.

Catch Me If You Can

Have you ever seen the film, “Catch Me If You Can,” with Leonardo Di Caprio and Tom Hanks? I have been asked so many times if this film was about conman Richard W Bennett and Detective James Clarkson. While it is not the case, at all, many see the similarities between Di Caprio’s character, Frank Abagnale, and Bennett’s real-life exploits.

I haven’t said two words about him in public until now. I’ve never mentioned him.

Richard W Bennett

This is the guy that opened my eyes to the reality of psychopathy. I testified against him in a trial that led to his incarceration for elder abuse.

There was a vulnerable adult in our community who had been a newspaper carrier his whole life. This gentleman was well-known and revered throughout the community and we all gave him a nod of approval anytime we saw him delivering papers or collecting cans.

Even with his mental and emotional challenges, he had amassed a respectable retirement nest egg for himself to live out his elder years, which he was clearly in the midst of in his late-seventies.

Richard W Bennett (his name at the time) befriended this vulnerable adult, becoming his “best friend” and financial consultant, and proceeded to take him for everything he had, leaving him homeless and penniless. While Richard lived in the lap of luxury, buying exotic cars, and illicit drugs, living the high life, spending this sensitive man’s money as fast as he could.

That was when I met Richard, Detective James Clarkson, FBI Agent Joe Lurf, and subsequently testified for the State in the case against Bennett.

At that moment he declared war against me, and swore he would do anything he could, sparing no expense, to destroy me, my family, turning anyone I knew against me, and put me behind bars. His last words to me, made from a phone call from a holding cell at the County Jail, were, “You’re lucky right now, because it’s me inside here instead of you, but your days are numbered.”

I calmly replied, “You are hereby notified, never to contact me again. We are done here.” And I hung up the phone, while I heard him raise his voice and say, “Wait…” (click). I was done, but he had only begun.

He announced his death with the cooperation of his brother, Robert Paul Bennett, on October 12, 2015.

Forever Bea: I married a psychopath in search of my soul mate

One woman’s courage to share her story is revealed in Shirli Kieffer’s Forever Bea delineating the details of Bea Davison’s search for her soul mate. Her story that begins as a god-fearing, hippie commune flower-child and follows her life, loves and struggles that come with psychopaths are drawn to you like a moth to the flame.

Forever-Bea-I-married-a-psychopath-in-search-of-my-soulmate

Davison’s attempt to live as a normal member of society after leaving the commune is fraught with unforeseen challenges.

Walking a mile in Bea’s shoes won’t change your life, but if you’ve been involved in a romantic relationship with a sociopath, you will find it comforting that you are neither alone, nor crazy.

And, hopefully, like Ms. Davison, you will never give up, remain optimistic and believe in love, while being cautious about the people that you allow to have access to your most intimate hopes, wants, dreams and desires.

You are not alone.

Forever Bea: I married a psychopath in search of my soul mate

is available in paperback and Kindle formats.

 

Psychopathic Character Assassination

You may be one of the unfortunate ones who were unfortunate to cross roads with a psychopath. If you’re fortunate, you were only temporarily targeted by the psychopath, and were used (possibly abused or picked-clean) then discarded like yesterday’s trash. Psychopaths excel at blending-in with society and they permeate all walks of life. You may encounter them at work, in religious organizations or you may find yourself in an intimate relationship with one.

psychopathic-character-assassinationSome people are lifetime targets of Psychopathic Character Assassination (Psyca) a full-on unbridled attempt by the “Path” (used interchangeably to represent either a psychopath or sociopath) to totally destroy any credibility that the unsuspecting victim may have had.

What makes this victim so special over the other victims, that they are targeted to be the recipients of a possibly life-long dedication to end all normal social interaction or positive human connection with other inhabitants of our planet?

Simply stated, in most cases, victims of Psyca normally self-select by knowing too much about the Path.

Paths routinely maintain at least two separate personas. One, a positive, gregarious, revered personality that is embraced by unsuspecting society, the other is their dark Path self: their evil twin. They may have many other personalities that they dial-in at any particular moment to manipulate their current audience (not to be confused with multi-personality disorder because they change personas at will with the intent to defraud).

It is imperative that the Path keep their dark sides hidden from the general populace. Think about it; if anyone knew who they really were, their lives would crumble. To the Path, protecting the secrecy of their true innate evil is as important to them as anything that provides life or sense of purpose to any other normal human being.

Paths usually launch their Psyca-attacks following a very calculated formula. Even though there is no known, “playbook,” that has been published for the Paths to follow, they all intuitively use the same system to ruin the lives of those who they feel may be a threat to the sacred secrecy of his or her true self. Certainly, making a potential witness appear to be a crazy, mentally disturbed, narcissistic sociopath, psychopath or pathological liar is the logical solution.

LAYING THE GROUNDWORK

Years of research and experience has concluded that usually within the first moments of engaging with a victim who might have access to too much personal information on the Path, they begin to sow the seeds of doubt and lack of trustworthiness behind the victim’s back.

The Path draws in the friends, family co-workers and acquaintances of the victims with his or her personal charm in an effort to build a (false) trust relationship with the fringe audience. This is accomplished with little effort as the Path has innate skills that easily manipulate the perceptions of others endearing them to him or her as they wield their persuasiveness and charm.

The initial impact, though appearing quite harmless and innocuous is commonly cloaked in the appearance of sincere concern for the victim’s well-being and might sound something, like, “I don’t know if you’ve ever noticed, but have you ever thought that (insert victim’s name) may not be what he (or she) appears to be?” No accusations, no data, reports or inclinations of anything concrete, just tilling the soil and fertilizing it with a little doubt.

All the while, they are increasing their own credibility with someone who may be a family member, friend, co-worker or acquaintance of the intended victim; unaware that they are being groomed as the Path’s minion who will be turned against the victim when the time is right.

SOWING FALSE “FACTS”

Grooming from this point forward will take a secretive slant and will likely be presupposed with something, like, “Don’t tell (insert name), but…” as they actually sow seeds of doubt.

As the relationship between the Path and his minion(s) grows deeper, more and more seeds will be sown in an effort to cast doubt, while the victim is none the wiser.

I’ve always thought it peculiar, that in most cases, these once close associates of the victim rarely, if ever, courteously approach them with the sensitive information with a sincere, “Hey, I was just wondering about (insert reports of lack of sanity, trustworthiness, a secret double-life, illicit drug-use, illegal activities, pathological symptoms, etc…)…” that would definitely be an early indicator that something was up.

In most, if not all, circumstances the victim continues to navigate their life’s journey unaware that the world they once enjoyed is being eroded or destroyed behind their back.

It is common for the Path to project their own psychological attributes onto you. For instance, if they are a closet illicit drug user, then this will be represented as being a problem for you. If he or she is manipulative or controlling, this would be presented as something that you struggle with unbeknownst to others. If they tend to make up elaborate stories, it will be the victim who secretly lives a fantasy-life where nothing is as it seems… on and on and on…

Why? Because no one knows these attributes better than the Path. They are the undeniable expert in these pathologies and they know how critical it is for someone who has them to keep them a secret in an effort to appear to be normal.

In no way am I suggesting that the Path might limit their Psyca-attacks to their own attributes. They are extremely acute at the skill of taking a known truth and spinning it into a ludicrous conclusion that will cast a dark shadow on anyone at any time.

ENTER THE “SPIN”

Paths have the ability to spin any factual data into an amazing story that will breed conspiracy or contempt for any individual at will.

For instance, let’s say that you had a hard day at work all day, due to struggling with an intense ongoing headache. Everyone at work could tell that you were not “on your game” as usual. If you intimated to the Path that you had a headache; that would give them the data that they needed to spin a tale.

The tale may take many shapes and forms, but will be consistent with some of the previous seeds that had been sown against you. For instance, if the Path’s intention was to have you appear to his or her minions that you were a closet illicit drug user, he or she might intimate, “Wow, did you notice that (insert your name) was out of it yesterday? It’s normal to go through withdrawals when you don’t get your fix before you get to work… It’s so sad…”

No matter what you say or do, you cannot prevent the Path from spinning it into a negative story about you that will erode your sense of normalcy.

THE BEGINNING OF THE END

When the Path has a clue that you are coming to the end of your usefulness in the accomplishment of their goals, he or she ramps up the defamation, usually making it appear that it is you who is beginning to attack them. At this point the Path will appeal to their minions’ sensibilities as they present themselves as the sacrifice, martyr or victim of your psychotic manipulations.

It will become apparent to you when your relationship with the Path is coming to an end, that there has been a definite polarity has taken place. People who were once your friends will drift away… and you will notice a gravitation toward the Path.

Having no internal filter, they will stop at nothing in an effort to humiliate you. They will spout vile accusations, even proclaim you’re mentally ill, if it will support their proclamation that you cannot be trusted or are inherently evil.

Trying to defend yourself is almost pointless. If the Path is quite proficient – as most of them are very accomplished – anything that you say in your defense will appear to be a part of your psychosis and will strengthen all of the groundwork that the Path has laid in preparation of this moment.

Even if the Path’s relationship with the minions begins to dissolve (as it almost always does when the Path moves on in search of new victims and minions), the seeds will always leave a mark in their minds… and as heartbreaking as it may be, in most cases, regardless of the ultimate outcome of the Path’s lifestyle, there may be no hope for recovering the life that you once knew.

Jobs and careers may be lost, friends will turn their backs on you, family members will distance themselves, the people that you once trusted with your most intimate thoughts and feelings will always wonder who you “really were” all the time they knew you.

THE RELENTLESS COMMITMENT TO YOUR DESTRUCTION

There is no way to anticipate how long the attacks will take place. In some cases, if the Path is the least bit concerned that you might at some point discredit them or tarnish their appearance or reputation… the attacks will continue. If the Path believes that at any point you could be a threat to their charade, the spinning will not cease. This perceived threat may continue until either of you cease to be.

Many Paths have come right out and made bold, public declarations that they, “will not rest until you are,” locked up, put away, homeless, or dead.

MEDIA MANIPULATION

Paths may even go as far as to manipulate the media. In many cases a Path may launch a character assassination media campaign in an effort to make certain that you will have little or no credibility whatsoever. Media campaigns may include radio shows, newspapers, magazines and social media pays quite effectively into their slanderous toolbox.

SOCIAL MEDIA

If you are active in social media, it is not very hard to tap into your network, and start spinning your friends, followers or associates against you as they spin everything you say or do against you.