Why me!!! It appears that i’m a magnet to sociopaths to the degree I have lost all trust in people and spend the majority of my time alone.
I have really suffered at the hands of these evil creatures. Not only mental abuse but my health is also in tatters. In 2005 I met a charming man who worked within the care industry, he was in the choir and appeared to be held in high regard within society.
I’m not afraid to take responsibility for making bad choices but it became evident that i was manipulated in to making those choices. A sexual relationship with this man soon developed and based on his believable reasons no protection was used.
Four months into the relationship I fell really ill and ended up in hospital. Many tests were run and it was discovered that I had throat cancer. I was devastated but got no support whatsoever from my partner, not even a visit in hospital. Whilst having to come to terms with being diagnosed with cancer my doctor informed me that the tests also showed serious inflammation of my liver.
They questioned how much alcohol I drank but I dont drink so that was out the question. Up on reflection I asked the doctor to give me a full sexual health screen to rule hepatitis out. When the results came back I went in to shock, I was HIV positive, had Hepatitis B and to top it all I had syphilis. I truly believed my life was over. It all started to make sense why my partner wouldnt visit me in hospital.
After a couple of weeks in hospital I was eventually allowed home to continue treatment as an outpatient. My partner was there to greet me, he said not to worry he still wanted me even if no one else would, under the circumstances I felt grateful. Both my parents have sadly passed and I have one sister of whom ive never had a close relationship with, and I didnt feel able to reach out for support from my friends due to the stigma attached to HIV so kept them at arms length and intern felt very isolated.
Over the next few months things went from bad to worse, I wasnt working because of my health and intern I had a lot of time to reflect.
To cut a long story short it became evident the man who claimed to love me had intentionally infected me with his infections and when I threatened to go to the police he attacked me with a knife, fortunately I only suffered minor injuries. I ran out the house and telephoned the police. When the police arrived I was outside in total fear of my life. They went in the house only to find him covered in blood! He’d cut himself with the knife a said I’d attacked him.
They arrested us both and I spent the night in prison. I was released in the morning pending further inquiries, he was released later on that day and manipulated his way straight back in to my home. I was desperate for the police to help me but was left feeling like a bunny boiler, I felt more isolated than ever!!
Why couldnt they see through his charm?!
I was under the power of a sociopath, had no support, my health was in the gutter and I was at a point were I could quite easily have given up. By this time i’d done my homework and ended up learning all about his destructive behaviour and what he was, a sociopath!
I’m not a doctor so couldnt go to the police and say my partner is a sociopath, help me I’m trapped. So i had to learn to play the game and get him out of my life.
After being told on a daily basis I was suicidal and that if I went to the police he would get to me before they got to him and I would be found in a pool of blood he left me. I thought that I’d won the battle to get my life back but then the death threats started. Emails saying ‘hit and run soon’ etc. I was more vulnerable than ever but at least by this time the police started to listen.
The police went to arrest him but couldnt trace him, he’d gone on the run! He left his home, car, job and family and hasnt been seen since. The police insisted I move house for my own safety, which I did. They installed panic buttons in my home and various other gadgets for my protection. Fortunately the death threats have since subsided but that doesnt mean that one day he wont raise his vile head again. This sociopath cost me My health, my life savings, my home and friends = my life. I can only hope and pray he doesnt come back and find me.
A year later in 2008 my health was under control, the cancer treatment had gone amazingly well, the syphilis treatment was 100% successful and I’d gone on meds and my HIV had become undetectable, however I still had Hepatitis B and the doctors said it was now unlikely I would clear it. I was just grateful to have my life back.
This story was submitted by a psychopath victim. – Admin
6 thoughts on “Blood Drawn, STDs – Why Me?”
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I am so very sorry that you lost everything- most importantly, your true identity for a period there. I am not sure I would have been able to pull myself out of the health,wealth,life pit that your encounter put you in. I am a health care provider and so is my Socialpath man. He is actually about to enter his last semester of RT care and has current victimized the programs female tourter. I have seen the light just in the past two months of this 2 1/2 friendship/ once dating relationship. My heart hurts for him and now his new prey- In may when he completes the program and passed his boards, with her giving him all the resources (test included) , he will be done and moved on to his next victim. That’s how they roll- I feel so blessed that God gave me the intuitiveness to keep searching for answers with his disrespectful, cold hearted, truely non caring for other person that was introduced into my life. He did not match my character in many way- I feel like it was like a curse. Thank you for this site . This is my very first post or response.
I am currently just in the realisation stage. My ex is a psycho. It is hard to come to terms with i can tick every charecteristic of a psycho when it comes to my ex and he is a very angry violent person too. The part i cant come to terms with is realising i have been living a lie for two years but i have a baby to him and he is currently using my baby as a weapon against me. I dont know how to handle it my head feels fried and i seem to have lost myself completely. I dont even know who i am anymore
Your story is harrowing. I can only imagine what you have been through. I too am a survivor of psychopathic abuse. I was physically,mentally and emotionally abused by a highly intelligent, glib & manipulative person.
I am now in intensive therapy. I hope you at least consider psychotherapy, and if you can- get as much as possible. I’ve only recently begun treatment, but it is making a real difference. I wish you only the very best.
im trying to leave now but have to lose a job , i cant replace and have trouble due to head injuries. and move in with my exhusband , start over also with herpes now. on top of it . . its really hard for me to see how to fill my future alone poor no job .
doesnt make leaving easy , i tried for 9 years . ill be 49 soon. i cant stay like this. my body is reacting because im not.