How to Deal with a Psychopath Video

Hello, my name is David Masters and I’m the author of the Psychopath Victims Toolkit.

A little about me, I’ve been counseling and consulting since the late seventies/early eighties. Occasionally, in the course of my coaching, I would encounter a client that had to mitigate the damages in their life due to the influence of a third-party individual, a “bad person.”

how-to-deal-with-a-psychopath-videoFrom my perspective, there were no such thing as bad people, just lost souls wandering aimlessly through life with little regard for others; and so, the advice that I gave to individuals in those days was very different than I might suggest now.

What I learned, was that there are people who are devoid of particular mental, emotional and spiritual components that compromises their humanity when integrating with other persons, we call these people psychopaths, sociopaths and the recent, more political correctly referred to as being on the Antisocial Personality Disorder spectrum.

That said, there are thousands of variables and no two psychopaths are identical, but they do share many similar characteristics.

So, how can you tell if you’re dealing with a psychopath? Here are some common signs that would indicate that you might be dealing with a psychopath in your life:

Is-he-or-she-a-psychopath-6-item-checklist1. CHARISMATIC

Psychopaths are charismatic and are able to attract supporters easily.

They are wonderful speakers who are able to engage their audience and can easily engage the emotions and attention of those fortunate enough to be in their presence.

They exaggerate stories skewing the truth for their self-serving benefit, and will go as far as to lie and place themselves in someone else’s story and claiming it is their own.

2. SMART

Psychopaths are intellectual. They have a gift of having incredibly sharp wit and intelligence enabling them to masquerade as highly-educated as they bob and weave socially in live situations.

This also makes them excellent con artists able to conceive, plan and execute elaborate schemes, while staying one step ahead of the authorities.

3. NO FEELINGS

Psychopaths have no feelings. They do not grieve, are incapable of feeling guilt, shame or remorse, empowering them to easily victimize anyone. They will enthusiastically engage in anything that bolsters their position at someone else’s expense.

They do not love. They are incapable of giving or receiving love, but terribly acute at acting as though they are madly in-love, if it will help them achieve a desired result.

They are great actors/performers giving them the ability to create any perception of themselves that will achieve for them their desired result.

Even though they can appear to have emotions and use them as tools to manipulate their victims, let there be no doubt, they have no real feelings whatsoever.

4. IMPULSIVE

Psychopaths are impulsive, often acting or speaking without thinking through potential consequences of their words or actions, and are more likely to spontaneously take risks.

They are free of repercussion, since they see themselves as above the law or the constraints of the social norm. No social filters, consequences or guilt.

5. WINNERS

Psychopaths never lose. They will dominate anyone who gets in their way, will viciously defend their position, often by telling lies and spinning wild tales in an effort to discredit anyone with the inclination to disagree with them.

If you are naïve enough to challenge them, be aware that they will wield their powers of persuasion to make you look like a fool for questioning them. Which presumes that they believe themselves to be:

6. NEVER WRONG

Psychopaths are always right. They never apologize; do not feel remorse for hurting others and are incapable of feeling guilt.

If asked to apologize, a psychopath will often strike out and attack their victim, rather than admit they may have made a mistake or misstep.

Now ask yourself, is the person you’re dealing with a psychopath?

Are they charismatic, smart, have no feelings, impulsive, always the winner and never wrong?

Chances are, you’re face-to-face with a psychopath.

You’re probably saying to yourself, “I knew it. I knew there was something wrong with that person…” You are realizing that you should rely more on your intuition that may have been warning you when you first met this person that something was not quite right. If only we learn to listen more to our gut, we would live happier, safe and secure lives, free from those who seek to exploit us.

If nothing else, that is the lesson to be learned from encountering a psychopath, is to trust your instincts and to not let yourself be taken advantage of by a cunning predator.

I would not, now, be an expert in the field of psychopathy had I not had my own first-hand experience with an evil psychopath that opened my eyes to the realities of the disorder. And now I have deep regret for all the folks that I was ill-equipped to be compassionate enough to reach out to them appropriately.

In this way, I may have attracted this psychopathic presence in my own life to benefit those whom it is my calling to assist along their life’s journey.

So, we’ve established that you have found yourself to be the unfortunate victim – or mark – of a psychopath, sociopath or someone amidst the antisocial personality disorder spectrum…

What Can You Do About It?

How to Deal With a Psychopath

How-to-deal-with-a-psychopath-6-item-checklist1. NO CONTACT

The very first thing to do is to crate as much separation as you can as soon as possible between yourself and the psychopath.

You need to distance yourself physically, financially, emotionally, spiritually and in any other way possible from the psychopath and cease any and all communication with him or her, period.

Any further communication or contact after correctly identifying a psychopath will only lead to more risk, or potential loss to you and yours.

Be aware that as you distance yourself, the psychopath will try to cling to you or play on your emotions in order to further victimize you. Do not fall for their manipulation or pity ploys from this point forward. They will try to appeal to your feeling but keep in mind they have no feelings and no regard for yours, except as a method to further victimize you.

You must cut them off. No contact, means no contact. Though this may not be possible, if you work or live with the psychopath; but that will be an issue to be handled specifically and independently of the scope of this primary message.

2. GET HELP

Next, you will need a strong support system. You should seek out a professional, a counselor or therapist, with experience in dealing with psychopaths. Note that early in my practice, even though individuals sought me out for assistance, I was ill-equipped to offer them the support that they needed at the time.

How can someone understand what you are going through, if they do not understand what you are going through… because – and I am as guilty of this as anyone – “things can’t really be all that bad.” But they are, and they can be very bad, and they can get worse if you do not take the appropriate actions.

Seek out a specialist, or at least someone with experience dealing with victims of psychopaths.

3. BE QUIET

Do not talk to your friends about the psychopath. You might think this is a good time to reach out to those in your circle of friends that you can depend on for support, but chances are (if the psychopath has done his or her homework) they have already gotten to them in advance.

If your friends have not been compromised by the psychopath, there is a good chance that they will be, and be forewarned very few people can compete with the ability to manipulate the minds of the unsuspecting, like the psychopath.

Keep things quiet. Do not confront your psychopath, engage in a battle of wits, challenge or attempt an intervention with your psychopath. This will only open you up for further potential pain, suffering and potential loss.

They psychopath has the uncanny ability to turn anything that you say against you. Don’t give them the opportunity.

4. STAY STRONG

Stay the course. If the psychopath has counter-attacks you, don’t respond.

If you communicate anything to this person it should only be silence. Be steadfast and unshakeable, solid as a rock.

He or she must realize that you cannot be manipulated or be bullied into making any kind of response, no matter what they do or say.

Keep a good posture, positive outlook, smile and be confident (even if you don’t feel like it) at all times.

Any indication of weakness will be seen as an opportunity either to insert themselves or launch another attack.

5. DOCUMENTATION

how-to-deal-with-a-psychopath-sociopath-david-m-mastersDocument everything. Keep hard copies of everything you can to document any interaction or statements made by your psychopath and keep it at a secure location.

Watch what you say. Act as if every word you speak is being recorded, and may be read to a jury in the future word-for-word and spun out of context in an effort to make you look like a lunatic.

Maybe someday the people who once trusted you will see the truth, but even so, if your psychopath was a masterful one, they will still wonder about you, even after the true colors of the psychopath are made known.

So, don’t hold onto the false hope of one day being vilified of all the illicit accusations that were made against you. In most cases the effects are permanent, though may fade over time. Maybe, in the afterlife…

6. FORGIVE YOURSELF

Most of all, forgive yourself. You were not the perpetrator, here, you were the victim. And as a victim you may have found yourself in vulnerable or compromising situations, and you may feel like the fool. But you were not the fool. Anyone could be victimized by the proficient psychopath and it happens every day in all walks of life and levels of society.

You could not have seen this coming… but now that you are aware, you are less likely to become a victim again… and maybe you can help others to see the signs – or at least be aware – that there are evil people out there, the virtual wolves in sheep’s clothing, who seek to destroy the lives of others without remorse.

Thank you for joining me for this message. It is my hope that this information will help to save you and other from further potential pain, suffering or loss at the hands of the psychopath. Pass this information on to others who may be potential victims.

For more information, or to contact me, visit psychopath victims dot com.

Psychopathic Smear Campaigns

One of the dead giveaways of psychopathic behavior is that of the vicious, psychotic character assassination campaigns that are wielded against anyone who stand in their way or might pose a threat to their agenda(s).

Please keep in mind that if you have become the targeted victim of a psychopath’s smear campaign, that it is nothing personal. In fact, nothing can ever be seen as “personal” to a psychopath as they are devoid of any feelings (like a normal person might have); no love, no hate, no empathy, no remorse. They only see other people as tools or possessions and may even use phrases, like:

  • psychopath-smear-campaigns-dont-respond-defend-react-negotiate-contact-use-social-mediaYou’re mine
  • I own you

And when they are done with you, they have so little regard for you that they might say:

  • I will end you
  • You will be nothing when I’m done with you

This campaign focused on your destruction need not have any basis in actual fact, as the psychopath will create an alternative universe using a method that transfers the attributes of the psychopath in an effort to discredit the victim so much that anything they might say would not be considered as a factual representation of the truth.

The battleground may include close personal relationships, workplaces and/or media (recently there has been a great deal of growth in social media arenas).

Psychopathy is no respecter of gender. A psychopathic woman conducting a smear campaign might claim that a person perceived as a threat is abusive, twisted, perverted or on the brink of sanity. If the victim(s) exerts the effort to spend a great deal of effort in defense of their character (i.e., testimony, closed circuit proof, eyewitness accounts and other relative data), the psychopath will never recount their initial claim. Instead they will put on additional pressure to even claim that he/she is in fear for his/her life and that the victim is a threat to other men, women and/children or even the future of mankind.

While destroying the life of the victim of such a psychopathic smear campaign, it sends a strong message to witnesses of the event, in effect warning them that they dare not find themselves on the wrong side of such a formidable foe.

It is quite ordinary for a normal person to spout ill reports about someone whom they feel has wronged them while in the throes of emotional trauma. In healthy individuals, as time passes and emotional healing takes place, they become much more tolerant of others who have chosen to follow a different path. Not so for the psychopath. For the psychopath it is a long-term commitment to bury their prey and sometimes it can be a lifetime obsession.

The appropriate response when attacked by a psychopathic smear campaign is not to respond, not to defend, not to react, and not to contact the predator ever again; period, as any response, no matter how negative, threatening or even a lawfully empowered response will only add fuel to the fire that runs the engine of the assailant. Do not ask the psychopath to stop or try to negotiate with him/her.

Without responding, document everything. In regards to the importance of documentation:

  • Documentation beats conversation
  • If it wasn’t documented, it didn’t happen

Seek legal recourse, venues and protection by law, if at all possible, holding the offender accountable for every word, threat or action as it occurs.

Report everything that happens to your local law enforcement agency. Even if the authorities roll their eyes at you for coming into their office to report and supply them with documentation, yet again, do it anyway. Even those who work in the service against criminals can be conned by the cunning psychopath. Stay the course, document and report everything.

Though you may be tempted to, resist posting information about your psychopathic encounter on social media as this is the devils’ playground. Also note that you should guard against sharing intimate details about your psychopathic encounters with other people because you never know who can be trusted (unless, of course, you know for a fact that the person in question is truly trustworthy). Psychopaths will manipulate those who have your confidence in order to probe you for information that feeds the psychopathic fire and they will be spreading lies about your credibility and/or sanity. Anything you say to them will be twisted and misconstrued to reflect upon you in the worst possible light.

Take away the impact of the psychopath’s abuse by having absolutely no response or contact whatsoever, and they eventually get bored and move onto some other more entertaining prey. The reaction of either the victim or others feeds their need to focus on the destruction of their prey.

Therein lays the rub. As social media becomes more accessible, we see psychopaths moving their smear campaigns to the Internet, which is much more difficult to control and can be a highly effective tool in the destruction of a victim’s character. Although the victim might have the wherewithal to ignore the fictitious ranting of the psychopath, other onlookers, unaware of the deception and those whom are fascinated by dirty laundry and drama, may provide the assailant the attention that they crave.

Reach out to a professional for support. People with no professional frame of reference or exhaustive experience dealing with psychopaths will not understand the true nature of the psychopath, and many professionals have been misled or swindled by psychopaths.

Resources include Domestic Violence workers, organizations, victim support groups, counselors or professionals with expertise in dealing with psychopathic abuse.

 

How to Report a Hater on Facebook

How-to-report-a-hater-on-facebookIf a psychopath is using facebook to attack victims:

1. Copy, paste and document all written communication
2. Send to appropiate channels victim(s), agencies, police
3. Report to facebook using online FB tools
4. Report/Block offender

Note: If you block or delete them 1st, you will not be able to document.

This from facebook:

If you are being harassed on Facebook, you can put a stop to it. Your profile is under your control, not the control of people who post to your wall. Here are a few simple steps you can take to stop people who are trying to hurt you.

Change Your Settings

Update Your Notifications Let’s start with the Account Settings. On the top right of each Facebook page there is a link called Settings. Click on that. Then click on the Notifications tab. Make sure that you are receiving an email every time someone posts to your wall, tags you in a post, tags you in a photo, tags you in your own photo, comments on your photos, comments on a photo of you, comments after you in a photo, comments on your photo albums, or comments after you in a photo album.
You also want to be notified if anyone replies to a discussion board post you made if you belong to any groups.
You also want to be notified if someone tags you in a note, comments on your notes, or comments after you in a note. Same for the links. You should also be notified if you are tagged in any videos or if anyone tags your videos. Also allow notifications of video comments about your videos or in videos in which you are featured.
Finally, you should be notified of any comments on a story on your Wall or if anyone comments after you on a Wall story.
Be sure to save your changes at the bottom of the page.
These are all areas where people can leave nasty comments or use as a way to harass other users. If the comment is made on your Wall, photos, videos, etc., you can simply delete and block the user (more on that in a minute.) If the post is made to someone else’s Wall, photos, videos, etc, you can report it. After each comment there is a link that says Report. Click it.

Change Your Privacy Settings
Go to the top right on the Facebook page and this time hover over Settings. A drop down menu appears. Go down to Privacy Settings and click on it.
We’ll start with your profile. Click on Profile Information. On this page, you will want to change all of your settings to Only Friends. Here, you can also change whether your friends can post to your Wall. If comments get particularly bad, you can uncheck this feature and no one else can post anything to your wall, even if they are on your Friends List.
Near the top on the left, click on Back to Privacy.
Click on Contact Information. There are two ways you can control this information. You can change all of these settings to Only Friends, with the exception of the Add me as a friend which you can change to Friends of Friends. Remember, you don’t have to add people as friends. You can ignore them. If you want even more privacy, you can choose the customize option and choose to make this information visible only to you.
The second way to keep this information private is to not put any of it on your profile in the first place. To edit this information, click on Profile in the upper left, then click on the Info tab. Here you can edit or remove any contact information you may have entered. You can also change who is allowed to see this information.
Back in the Privacy Settings, click on Search. Change the Facebook Search Results to Only Friends and uncheck the Public Search Results.
Go back to Privacy. Click on Block List. This is extremely useful if there are a few people who are causing you the most trouble. Simply enter their user name (their name as it appears on Facebook) and click Block. Or enter their email address and click Block. The people you put on this list will no longer be allowed to interact with you. Double check and go to your Friends List and remove these people as your friends. You have every right to do so.

Removing Content from Your Wall
If you have comments on your wall, you can delete them. On your Wall, move your mouse to the right side of the offending comment and click on Remove.

Report the Harassment
You will need to do this step before blocking a user and it will only work for people who are not on your Friends List. Go to the profile of the person who has been harassing you. Scroll all the way to the bottom of the page and in the left hand corner you will see the link Report/Block this Person. Click on it and fill out the form that appears. You can block this person at the same time. The report is kept confidential.

If the Harassment Continues
If you have changed all of your settings and blocked the people responsible, you can continue to be harassed or bashed on Facebook. If a friend notifies you that there is someone who is continuing to bash you or try to get others to harass you, ask your friend to report these people as outlined in the Report the Harassment section.

Forever Bea: I married a psychopath in search of my soul mate

Forever-Bea-I-married-a-psychopath-in-search-of-my-soulmateOne woman’s courage to share her story is revealed in Shirli Kieffer’s Forever Bea delineating the details of Bea Davison’s search for her soul mate. Her story that begins as a god-fearing, hippie commune flower-child and follows her life, loves and struggles that come with psychopaths are drawn to you like a moth to the flame.

Davison’s attempt to live as a normal member of society after leaving the commune is fraught with unforeseen challenges.

Walking a mile in Bea’s shoes won’t change your life, but if you’ve been involved in a romantic relationship with a sociopath, you will find it comforting that you are neither alone, nor crazy.

And, hopefully, like Ms. Davison, you will never give up, remain optimistic and believe in love, while being cautious about the people that you allow to have access to your most intimate hopes, wants, dreams and desires.

You are not alone.

Forever Bea: I married a psychopath in search of my soul mate

is available in paperback and Kindle formats.

 

Psychopathic Character Assassination

You may be one of the unfortunate ones who were unfortunate to cross roads with a psychopath. If you’re fortunate, you were only temporarily targeted by the psychopath, and were used (possibly abused or picked-clean) then discarded like yesterday’s trash. Psychopaths excel at blending-in with society and they permeate all walks of life. You may encounter them at work, in religious organizations or you may find yourself in an intimate relationship with one.

psychopathic-character-assassinationSome people are lifetime targets of Psychopathic Character Assassination (Psyca) a full-on unbridled attempt by the “Path” (used interchangeably to represent either a psychopath or sociopath) to totally destroy any credibility that the unsuspecting victim may have had.

What makes this victim so special over the other victims, that they are targeted to be the recipients of a possibly life-long dedication to end all normal social interaction or positive human connection with other inhabitants of our planet?

Simply stated, in most cases, victims of Psyca normally self-select by knowing too much about the Path.

Paths routinely maintain at least two separate personas. One, a positive, gregarious, revered personality that is embraced by unsuspecting society, the other is their dark Path self: their evil twin. They may have many other personalities that they dial-in at any particular moment to manipulate their current audience (not to be confused with multi-personality disorder because they change personas at will with the intent to defraud).

It is imperative that the Path keep their dark sides hidden from the general populace. Think about it; if anyone knew who they really were, their lives would crumble. To the Path, protecting the secrecy of their true innate evil is as important to them as anything that provides life or sense of purpose to any other normal human being.

Paths usually launch their Psyca-attacks following a very calculated formula. Even though there is no known, “playbook,” that has been published for the Paths to follow, they all intuitively use the same system to ruin the lives of those who they feel may be a threat to the sacred secrecy of his or her true self. Certainly, making a potential witness appear to be a crazy, mentally disturbed, narcissistic sociopath, psychopath or pathological liar is the logical solution.

LAYING THE GROUNDWORK

Years of research and experience has concluded that usually within the first moments of engaging with a victim who might have access to too much personal information on the Path, they begin to sow the seeds of doubt and lack of trustworthiness behind the victim’s back.

The Path draws in the friends, family co-workers and acquaintances of the victims with his or her personal charm in an effort to build a (false) trust relationship with the fringe audience. This is accomplished with little effort as the Path has innate skills that easily manipulate the perceptions of others endearing them to him or her as they wield their persuasiveness and charm.

The initial impact, though appearing quite harmless and innocuous is commonly cloaked in the appearance of sincere concern for the victim’s well-being and might sound something, like, “I don’t know if you’ve ever noticed, but have you ever thought that (insert victim’s name) may not be what he (or she) appears to be?” No accusations, no data, reports or inclinations of anything concrete, just tilling the soil and fertilizing it with a little doubt.

All the while, they are increasing their own credibility with someone who may be a family member, friend, co-worker or acquaintance of the intended victim; unaware that they are being groomed as the Path’s minion who will be turned against the victim when the time is right.

SOWING FALSE “FACTS”

Grooming from this point forward will take a secretive slant and will likely be presupposed with something, like, “Don’t tell (insert name), but…” as they actually sow seeds of doubt.

As the relationship between the Path and his minion(s) grows deeper, more and more seeds will be sown in an effort to cast doubt, while the victim is none the wiser.

I’ve always thought it peculiar, that in most cases, these once close associates of the victim rarely, if ever, courteously approach them with the sensitive information with a sincere, “Hey, I was just wondering about (insert reports of lack of sanity, trustworthiness, a secret double-life, illicit drug-use, illegal activities, pathological symptoms, etc…)…” that would definitely be an early indicator that something was up.

In most, if not all, circumstances the victim continues to navigate their life’s journey unaware that the world they once enjoyed is being eroded or destroyed behind their back.

It is common for the Path to project their own psychological attributes onto you. For instance, if they are a closet illicit drug user, then this will be represented as being a problem for you. If he or she is manipulative or controlling, this would be presented as something that you struggle with unbeknownst to others. If they tend to make up elaborate stories, it will be the victim who secretly lives a fantasy-life where nothing is as it seems… on and on and on…

Why? Because no one knows these attributes better than the Path. They are the undeniable expert in these pathologies and they know how critical it is for someone who has them to keep them a secret in an effort to appear to be normal.

In no way am I suggesting that the Path might limit their Psyca-attacks to their own attributes. They are extremely acute at the skill of taking a known truth and spinning it into a ludicrous conclusion that will cast a dark shadow on anyone at any time.

ENTER THE “SPIN”

Paths have the ability to spin any factual data into an amazing story that will breed conspiracy or contempt for any individual at will.

For instance, let’s say that you had a hard day at work all day, due to struggling with an intense ongoing headache. Everyone at work could tell that you were not “on your game” as usual. If you intimated to the Path that you had a headache; that would give them the data that they needed to spin a tale.

The tale may take many shapes and forms, but will be consistent with some of the previous seeds that had been sown against you. For instance, if the Path’s intention was to have you appear to his or her minions that you were a closet illicit drug user, he or she might intimate, “Wow, did you notice that (insert your name) was out of it yesterday? It’s normal to go through withdrawals when you don’t get your fix before you get to work… It’s so sad…”

No matter what you say or do, you cannot prevent the Path from spinning it into a negative story about you that will erode your sense of normalcy.

THE BEGINNING OF THE END

When the Path has a clue that you are coming to the end of your usefulness in the accomplishment of their goals, he or she ramps up the defamation, usually making it appear that it is you who is beginning to attack them. At this point the Path will appeal to their minions’ sensibilities as they present themselves as the sacrifice, martyr or victim of your psychotic manipulations.

It will become apparent to you when your relationship with the Path is coming to an end, that there has been a definite polarity has taken place. People who were once your friends will drift away… and you will notice a gravitation toward the Path.

Having no internal filter, they will stop at nothing in an effort to humiliate you. They will spout vile accusations, even proclaim you’re mentally ill, if it will support their proclamation that you cannot be trusted or are inherently evil.

Trying to defend yourself is almost pointless. If the Path is quite proficient – as most of them are very accomplished – anything that you say in your defense will appear to be a part of your psychosis and will strengthen all of the groundwork that the Path has laid in preparation of this moment.

Even if the Path’s relationship with the minions begins to dissolve (as it almost always does when the Path moves on in search of new victims and minions), the seeds will always leave a mark in their minds… and as heartbreaking as it may be, in most cases, regardless of the ultimate outcome of the Path’s lifestyle, there may be no hope for recovering the life that you once knew.

Jobs and careers may be lost, friends will turn their backs on you, family members will distance themselves, the people that you once trusted with your most intimate thoughts and feelings will always wonder who you “really were” all the time they knew you.

THE RELENTLESS COMMITMENT TO YOUR DESTRUCTION

There is no way to anticipate how long the attacks will take place. In some cases, if the Path is the least bit concerned that you might at some point discredit them or tarnish their appearance or reputation… the attacks will continue. If the Path believes that at any point you could be a threat to their charade, the spinning will not cease. This perceived threat may continue until either of you cease to be.

Many Paths have come right out and made bold, public declarations that they, “will not rest until you are,” locked up, put away, homeless, or dead.

MEDIA MANIPULATION

Paths may even go as far as to manipulate the media. In many cases a Path may launch a character assassination media campaign in an effort to make certain that you will have little or no credibility whatsoever. Media campaigns may include radio shows, newspapers, magazines and social media pays quite effectively into their slanderous toolbox.

SOCIAL MEDIA

If you are active in social media, it is not very hard to tap into your network, and start spinning your friends, followers or associates against you as they spin everything you say or do against you.

 

Psychopath 7 Item Checklist

It is not uncommon to encounter a sociopath or psychopath at some point in one’s life. In the beginning, it may be one of the greatest experiences in your life, but as time goes on, it will likely be the worst experience in your life. They come in both genders, though most are male. They have been referred to as emotional vampires, sucking the life (emotional and financial resources) out of those that they have influence over.

Is-he-or-she-a-psychopath-7-item-checklistSociopath is the new, more politically correct label for a psychopath, so henceforth when I refer to a “sociopath” know that it is interchangeable with psychopath (psychopath is the old-school reference that I believe is a more accurate label of the condition).

The only defense one has against a sociopath is early detection. So, here’s a checklist of seven items that may give you the head’s up that this “someone” in your life, may not be all that he (or she) appears to be. So, here are seven signs to help you figure out if you might be dealing with a sociopath (hopefully before you’ve suffered damages):

  1. Sociopaths are charismatic and are able to attract supporters easily. They are wonderful speakers who are able to engage their audience who can easily engage the emotions and attention of those fortunate enough to be in their presence. They exaggerate stories skewing the truth for their self-serving benefit, and will go as far as to lie and place themselves in someone else’s story and claiming it is their own.
  2. Sociopaths are intellectual. They have a gift of having incredibly sharp wit and intelligence enabling them to masquerade as highly-educated, bob and weave in live situations. This also makes them excellent con artists able to conceive, plan and execute elaborate schemes, while (mostly) staying one step ahead of the authorities.
  3. Sociopaths are devoid of feelings. They do not grieve, are in capable of feeling guilt, shame or remorse, empowering them to easily victimize anyone. They will enthusiastically engage in anything that bolsters their position at someone else’s expense. They do not love. They are incapable of giving or receiving love, but terribly acute at acting as though they are in the throes of love, if it will help them achieve a desired result. They are great actors/performers with no real feelings whatsoever.
  4. Sociopaths are impulsive, often acting or speaking without thinking through potential consequences of their words or actions, and are more likely to take risks, being free of repercussion, since they see themselves as above the law or the constraints of the social norm.
  5. Sociopaths never lose. They will dominate anyone who gets in their way, will vehemently defend their position, often by telling lies and spinning wild tales in an effort to discredit naysayers.
  6. Sociopaths are never wrong. They never apologize; do not feel remorse for hurting others and are incapable of feeling guilt. If asked to apologize, will often strike out and attack their victim, rather than admit they may have made a mistake or misstep.
  7. Sociopaths believe their own press. Once they have said something, it becomes gospel in their mind; so much so, that they can often believe their own bold-faced lies, even to the point of being able to pass a lie detector test. They keep a long list of secrets, and are not forthcoming about intimate details of their past, unless they are fictitious.

So, what do you do if you discover you’re in the presence of a sociopath?

Simply put as much distance between yourself and them as soon and as safely as possible. Curtail any continued communication with them immediately if not sooner. Be aware that if they have not bled you dry, or achieved their goal in manipulating you; they will do anything in their power to repair their relationship with you, so that they can complete their exploitation of you.

Don’t let them do it. Surround yourself with friends who will help shelter you from further exposure.

Thanks to Damon Marturion for this post.